


And After All,

by insufferableThespian



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Death, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Major Character Injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-19
Updated: 2016-11-19
Packaged: 2018-08-31 06:54:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8568580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/insufferableThespian/pseuds/insufferableThespian





	

It doesn't hurt anymore. Nothing does. All I can feel is the thump of my heart beat down my arm.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

The icy cruor spilling out and onto the floor. What was once fiery hot, a driving life force, now a muddled puddle on the tile. But that's okay. **_"It vwill be okay"_**. You would always say that. Every time something felt irrevocable. Every moment something felt insurmountable to restore. Just like this. In the end we will both be smiling, because it will be okay. In the end we won't be suffering, immense pain wrenching our pushers. I have a no perception of why it hurts so much. Why my chest hurts more than my arm. Why physical injury hurts less than a meaningless emotional one.  

Remember when we hardly ever even spoke together? Ha! Such a long time ago. I just didn't wish to acknowledge your existence. I was so silly, wasn't I? Never wishing to give up on all I had known. Wishing to forget the days spent trapped in a foolish game together. Sweeps stuck in a lifeless limbo forever. I would tell you off whenever I could, if it meant to hide the smile creeping up on my face. The heat rising to my cheeks. 

 Your chest is so cold. But I guess it always has been, your blood was so much colder than mine. Being cold blooded must have irked you. A cold blooded human. It explains why you were always so chilled in the winter perigee. Why you had to wear jackets over sweaters, coats over hoods. Why your face would flush violet and your teeth would chatter. Yet you would never hesitate to lend me your coat if I were shivering. A true gentleman, to say the least.

Oh, I'm staining your shirt with my tears. I'm so sorry about that. You shouldn't wear white around me, huh? All your shirts must be pink by now. Red fading light. I am always crying, aren't I? I have no right to cry. I have too much privilege to feel sorry for myself. I should be happy with what I have. What I had. Yet you still wore white. Knowing I would ruin it. What do you call that? Tolerance? Forgiveness? 

You're so quiet today. Haven't said a word. So unlike you. You could never stand to be silent in a room. Too many things to say, too much coquet to express. I hated it once, for a long time. Only because it worked so well, quite the cruiser you were. When you were not eloquently flirting you would be singing. Tales of love and war. Almost like a siren in the sea. Swirling in the waves, water thicker than blood. 

There's so much blood on the floor. A cocktail of violet and scarlet. Isn't it pretty? I think it is. Royal and blasphemous. Dignified and menial. You and I.

Everything is so hazy. I miss your voice a lot right now.. What was that song you'd sing all the time? Wonderwall, right? I love that song...

And all the roads we have to walk are winding.

And all the lights that light the way are blinding.

There are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how...

Because maybe,

You're gonna be the one that saves me,

And after all,

You're my wonderwall...

You're my wonderwall.....

You're my...

My..

Wonder.....

 


End file.
